isuck

i suck at keeping this journal alive :( mostly bc i don't know how to use this. and bc lj has the private posts option :) on the contrary, i learned how to follow peoples blogs! but i only know one other person LOL so DENNIS MOON, you are special. your birthday is coming up too!

SO winter breaks been pretty goooood! went to a lot of places on my "places to go" list. hung out with gun every freaking day, except sunday bc he goes golfing those days. i havent been to my dads house lately so i could spend more time w. gun. he leaves sunday morning :( i'm pretty sad. i don't even start school till the 26th. speaking of school, i added another class today; thus, concluding that i have 5 classes now. tu th 8:30am-3:45pm is when i'll be on campus. i have to buy my parking permit today but my mom took my car to get soup and i need my lp#. she's been gone for like an hour?

so like any other stupid girl, i got into the whole twilight "phase." the books are amazing though- on the real. anyone who knows me, knows i dont like reading at all. i loathe it. however, these books, 500+ pages takes me only a day to read? i really enjoy them. i'm on the last book now. i hate it when good things end. wtf am i going to read next? reading is like my new hobby. i doubt i'll keep it up once school starts again though and alice comes back to room w. me. when she's here, i'm out every second dude.

i've been so stressed lately bc of college. i fucking hate it. i'm so confused on what i want to major in nowadays. i always saw myself as a doctor, but now that i look at it, it all disappears. gun, always, always looked at himself as a business man like his dad. but he recently changed his major to psychology. weird huh?

one of my worse fears is to fail. i don't want to fail in life. i don't want to disappoint anyone. and that's my problem. i'll do anything for anyone regardless of how it affects me.

but really, i'm far from being a martyr.